FreshRSS

🔒
❌ About FreshRSS
There are new articles available, click to refresh the page.
Before yesterdaySharing God's Story

An Update to My Ever-Changing Situation

More than likely, I now have ALS.

There’s no better way than to just say it. Add the condition to my list of health issues although this one could be the one that’s too much.

Well, June 12, 2019 was my last post. Today is September 14, 2020. I surely do have some updating to do!

(BTW I’ve forgotten almost everything about WordPress.)

To keep a long story short, the biggest health events were:

October 31, 2019, Halloween – my fistula access was infiltrated badly – when my INR has high, resulting in bleeding caused a “pseudo-aneurysm” in my forearm. This required surgery. Then, my upper arm developed hematomas, again while my INR was way-high. This resulted in two more surgeries. I was hospitalized for most of November and December.

Due to the swelling, my nerves were damaged. My left arm was useless with constant tingling and numbness in my wrist, hand, and thumb, index, middle, and half of my ring fingers (which continues to this day). This required months of Occupational Therapy – interrupted, of course, by the Covid lock-down.

Right around that time, April/May, I started developing slurred speech; a little at first (at times of talking a lot) but worsening to constant. And my swallowing ability is now affected, too: my food has to be blendered, and straws/bottles are out.

We’ve been to two neurologists and undergone a double-battery of tests which have eliminated everything but the dreaded ALS.

The diagnosis is still recent; we’re trying to get a handle on what it means for our family. My next neurologist appointment is 9/24.

I was happy to see I had a bookmark for SGS posts so I will keep updating you here.

sharinggodsstory

Blessings and Lessons

Hello!

I suppose I should say “Welcome Back!”

Or you should say that to me?

August of 2018 was my last post to Sharing God’s Story. Because I’ve been dealing with mental/emotional/spiritual stuff  – kicked off by that hernia-repair catastrophe in November 2017.

It’s taken a while, but I think I’m getting back on track. And so, I had an idea about what I could do.

Kinda start over.

Well, start a new blog, for instance. A blog about taking 11 years of journals and shaping the Blessings and Lessons they contain into something that you, dear reader, might be interested in and could actually benefit from.

I say I’ve been in “recovery” from a lot of hurts, habits, and hangups, and I wrote daily about the wonderful things I was learning. Another way you could describe it is ‘The blessings and lessons of discovering the real me and the purpose I have here.’

So I intend to write a book containing all the gems of wisdom documented in those 18 diaries, and I’m going to blog about the whole process! (A book and a blog about writing the book!)

This is my commitment to you. And I hope you will feel free to hold me accountable to this goal.

Now that I’ve started, I feel great anticipation in moving on to the next step!

sharinggodsstory

What A Tic Tac Taught Me

See the source imageRemember Tic Tacs? Introduced in 1969 and still sold today, the mint is a favorite.

I remember as a kid consuming whole packs of them within a short time. (Nana and Grandpa were shocked.)

Recently, after hearing somewhere that peppermint has a beneficial effect on digestive issues, I reacquainted myself with these “pills,” and now keep them available in the car, at my bedside, and in my dialysis bag.

(Point being, I’ve held a lot of Tic Tac packs in my hands.)

I had never seen an imperfect Tic Tac until I found this:
IMG_0102    IMG_0103   IMG_0034(1)  IMG_0033(1)

(Yes, I saved it.) I was sitting in my dialysis chair when I came across the broken tablet, so I had plenty of time to think upon it.

You probably won’t be surprised that I thought of the parable of the lost sheep – the one and the ninety-nine.

The world’s way is to leave the one. It’s not practical or cost-effective to delay or drop everything for the lost or faulty, especially in today’s throw-away culture.

We’ve all been among the ninety-nine, not wanting to wait to get to wherever we’re going. We could not care less.

Until we are that one. (Yes, I believe every one of us has been there.) And when we’re saved or have consideration given to us, I hope we all will never hold that selfish, compassionless attitude again.

sharinggodsstory

See the source image

IMG_0102

IMG_0103

IMG_0034(1)

IMG_0033(1)

Is This Thing (Still) On?

CFC Never Stop

I guess you could say I took the summer off.

Honestly, though, I haven’t been sure I wanted to keep doing this… this blogging (sharing? preaching?) thing.
Honestly, I was hoping for thousands of followers after three years. (OK, two and three-quarters years.)

But, I’m still staring into the face of AA’s Step Twelve and Celebrate Recovery’s Principle Eight:

“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

“Yield myself to God to be used to bring this good news to others both by my example and by my words.”

So, I’m back. Ready to return to school, so to speak. Ready to continue learning and sharing what I learn.

I pray you all with keep reading!

sharinggodsstory

CFC Never Stop

Righteousness vs Rightness

Righteousness vs Rightness

Righteousness vs Rightness
— Read on live4him.ca/2018/08/07/righteousness-vs-rightness-2/

Great message. I think the most important point is the paragraph about death deserved but Jesus stepped in – written as if (the way I read it) only speaking of others. I’ve found that it’s a harder (and constant) struggle to include myself in that statement. That is, I get hung up on self-condemnation.

sharinggodsstory

CrossFit: Going My Own Pace

For my family challenging themselves with xfit…

CrossFit: Going My Own Pace

CrossFit: Going My Own Pace
— Read on crossfitmomm.com/2018/07/26/crossfit-going-my-own-pace/

sharinggodsstory

The Grind

One of those “I want to write this” posts to share…

The Grind

The Grind
— Read on cristianmihai.net/2018/07/26/the-grind/

sharinggodsstory

A Life on Faith Support

Dear Reader,

pexels-photo-695963.jpegIf you’ve been following, you’ll have read about my disastrous hernia repair this past November. Today, six months later, I think I’ve finally reached an understanding about why it’s been so life-threatening.

You see, since that incident, my Faith has been on Life Support.

It’s a combination of things that’s left me like this.

Obviously, there was the excruciating physical pain I experienced, and, now, fear of risking that agony again, even (and especially) by undergoing the elective, “normal life-restoring” kidney transplant.Image result for bible verses god's big picture

Then there’s the absolute irony of “sailing” – so to speak – through several serious surgeries (i.e. open heart, having part of my colon removed) – only to be sunk by a routine, out-patient operation.

small crossMostly, though, it’s been emotional and spiritual stuff.

I’ve had a lot of doubt and anger at God for letting it happen to me, for putting me through it. I’ve lost my trust in Him. Doesn’t He promise not to harm me?

And I’ve been fretting over our financial future. For the past four years, I’ve been on disability. I’ve done some part-time, sit-down rideshare driving, but, otherwise, I haven’t had to work, to labor.
That would change a year after successful transplant when benefits would end.

And what about His plans to prosper? Three years of blogging for a mere two hundred followers? That’s not the fruitful ministry I envisioned for Sharing God’s Story.

I think I’ve found the answer in that last sentence – and it’s something that’s tripped me up many times before.IMG_4207

My Life is supposed to be on Faith Support.

See the source image

Father God,
I’ve been crying out about where You went, where You’ve been. But I took myself off Faith Support.

I’ve wanted to know how You will work this for my good – what are Your plans to prosper and not to harm me? 

But that’s not how You work. My plans and Yours don’t always agree. Neither does Your timing. And which always ends up perfect?

I forgot the lessons You’ve brought me through these past ten years, and the absolute trust I had found at a few precious milestone moments along this crazy journey.

That is the kind of faith I need again: trust instead of fear, in spite of fear.

Help me to let go:

  • of fear,
  • of expectations on how You will work all things,
  • of my plans for how You should work things,
  • of life itself, (O yes, I do know how to do this)
  • of the need to be the one to plan it all out
    (that’s Your department)

Mine is to simply take one step – the next right step, by Your guidance – at a time.
Please shine Your light extra-brightly on what that is for today.
Like You always have.
Help me to see it, to be still, and to look and listen.

0A822E1E-36EC-48D9-9E1A-C8ABDC58D068-421-00000051D99B40D1_file

sharinggodsstory

pexels-photo-695963.jpeg

Image result for bible verses god's big picture

small cross

IMG_4207

See the source image

“Cheap” Grace?

small crossHave you ever heard the phrase “Cheap Grace?”

It’s meant to describe a sinner’s attitude toward God’s forgiveness when that sinner continues to sin – when that sinner chooses to continue to sin and knows he/she is doing so. Recently, I had a revelation about “cheap Grace.”

There’s no such thing.

pexels-photo-811103.jpeg
First, Grace is most definitely not and can never be cheap. This is simply because of the price Christ paid for it. He gave everything he had – and more – in order to give Grace to me.

Second, that price has already been paid. And this is the important thing – the revelation: nothing I ever do or don’t do can ever change that. Whether I know I’m sinning or not doesn’t matter. Grace remains paid for and given.

IMG_3346Third, perfection on my part is not possible, and won’t be until Jesus “returns or calls me home.” IOW, I’m going to fall again and again in this life, sooner or later. The important thing is whether or not I get back up and try again, knowing that He died for me and that I can stand in His strength.

Fourth, regarding trying again, I will never stop reaching out to grasp the hand being held out to me. I simply can’t. Another way to look at this is in the idea that I can never “unknow” Grace. It’s like seeing something. I can never unsee it.

pexels-photo-267559.jpegSure, I can doubt. My faith can waver. But there will always be that thread connecting me to Him. I won’t ever be free of it. (This is actually a comforting thought.)

Fifth, cheap Grace requires that I think something I do or don’t do effects my condition in God’s eyes. This is the same thing as saying that I can earn or deserve it.

I know I can never earn, will never deserve, nor ever afford Grace. It is a gift. It’s freely offered, no strings attached.

And it’s that knowledge that empowers me to keep working on changing my heart and my behaviors.IMG_3218

pexels-photo-811103.jpeg

sharinggodsstory

small cross

IMG_3346

pexels-photo-267559.jpeg

IMG_3218

❌